Personal Story - Entrepreneurs

My husband and I are both entrepreneurs.  About 10 years ago, my husband and some partners started a company.  Due to the nature of the business, there are a lot of upfront costs.  He continued to work full-time for another company and worked at night on his own company with hopes it would take off.  The economy took a turn for the worse and they were unable to find an investor.  The partners and their families continued to invest with "loans" to the company by means of 401K, savings, mortgages, and credit cards to keep the company going.  The product was well liked but expensive to manufacture in small quantities and with the economy downturn, the comnpany struggled without enough money for marketing.   My husband's full-time job was for a small company and they knew he had his own company on the side.  They were very tolerant when he had to take time away from his job and very flexible.  But in a normal week, he worked his full-time job during the day and then worked evenings, late nights and weekends on his own company, often working 60-80 hours a week and getting to spend little time with the family.  It was draining but we all persevered.

In 2005, I started a business as well.  It is a service business - I work for others from my home.  It has continued to grow over the years mostly by word of mouth (clients referred other potential clients to me).  It became a good part-time income and provided for a lot of extras.  And I enjoyed the work ... I liked the thrill of getting projects done and figuring out problems. I love my children, but needed something more than being a mom for me personally to be happy.  My husband was always very proud of me and my business, but I never expected that my "hobby" business would eventually be our entire livelihood. 

In September 2009, my husband lost his full-time job, no warning ... no severance.  The company went under so one day they just closed their doors.  Suddenly, my "part-time" income was our only income.  With no job to be found that would allow him the flexibility to continue working on his own company (and too much debt from the company in our own personal names), our only chance was for my husband to work for his own company full-time and hope to finally get it off the ground.  So, that's what we committed to... that and him helping me with my business so I could continue to make it grow and keep us afloat.  Several times we thought we had an investor or even were going to get bought-out, but each time our hopes were dashed when something went wrong at the last minute. Keep in mind, we had lived very generously in the past. We worked hard, and although we had lived within our means, we had a lot of debt in our name for the company and we had no savings.

Emotionally, our lives were a ROLLER COASTER.  For 20 months, we would find hope in something and then it would be dashed as that fell through.  An investor would come along and everything would be very hopeful, giving us hope but at the last minute, they would back out, leaving us doubting ourselves, doubting the future, angry, depressed ... feeling alone again.  We went through this roller coaster several times.  My husband didn't have a paying job, but he and I both worked constantly with hopes of things getting better.  One light during all this, was a comforting feeling that it will all be ok eventually.  We didn't know what the future held but we had each other and our kids and we were all healthy.  I had seen others struggle with by far worse challenges ... cancer taking a life of a sister, an life-changing injury to a friend's child, divorce.  I reminded myself almsot daily about how much worse it could be. 

Fortunately, for us, we were very blessed by my business.  We were guided to take steps that caused my business to more than double during the 20 months.  We had enough income to allow us to modify our mortgage through the government home modification program. It was a meager income but with the modification in place (and a much lower payment) and the help from the Church Storehouse, we were able to stay afloat.  But that didn't change how alone we felt, how frustrated, discouraged and even angry at times.  We constantly tried to have faith.  I turned to the scriptures more often, I paid my tithing on my business income and got a current temple recommend.  Having faith was difficult, but it was a blessing. 

When things were starting to get really bleak, my husband was offered a job that would be very flexible, but at about 1/3 of his prior pay.  With the growth in my business, 1/3 still wouldn't cover everything, but it would help us.  It has brought hope as we can now start to move forward after 20 months.